Home Forums WWII What do Goats, Coyotes, Pandas and Stonehenge Have In Common? Reply To: What do Goats, Coyotes, Pandas and Stonehenge Have In Common?

#18483
Rod Robertson
Participant

Kyoteblue and Al-Panda el Harb:

Are these the extremely rare pictures of the infamous Malmedy Menagerie Massacre where a deranged Joachim Dolittle lined up and slaughtered 84 innocent animals as retribution for a French pigeon pooping on his head in late 1944? The massacre was said to have occurred on the Napoleon Animal Farm near the town of Oruel in France. It is rumoured that Joachim Dolittle was under the sinister influence of an ancient principality or divinity which had left an indelible mark on him when he had served as a submarine crewman aboard U-1984 in the Pacific Ocean in 1941. If so these photos are very valuable as Thyme Magezine has offered hundreds of thousands USD for these snapshots.

As an aside, Dolittle, while a German citizen, was raised and educated in England and spoke perfect English with an upper class Received British accent. This led to his German companions giving him the nick name “Lime”. Now in 1941, while still serving in the Kriegsmarine as second mate on U-1984, Dolittle visited the United States. He was having vision problems, and so visited the Walter Reed Hospital to have his eyes examined and glasses prescribed. While at the hospital he met a mental patient named Howard Phillips who had been transferred from Arkham Asylum to the Walter Reed Hospital for observation and study. This patient claimed to have visited a sunken and ruined city deep in the Pacific which he called R’lyeh and was rumoured to have polluted Dolittle’s mind and soul with stories of an ancient and demonic godling which the madman called “Cthulhu” in deep guttural syllables. These stories may have warped the mind of Dolittle so badly that he rapidly became violently antisocial and was soon expelled from the Kriegsmarine. So violent and vicious was Dolittle that the only organisation that would have him was the dreaded and despised SS, which he joined in September of 1943. During his time in the SS Dolittle’s depravity and penchant for extreme violence grew. After the war he was discovered, arrested and soon after tried and convicted of the most heinous war crimes and atrocities at the Nuremburg Tribunals. Following his conviction he was hanged and then buried anonymously in a pauper’s grave. Jorge Barbahunt, Dolittle’s biographer, famously summed up the man’s wicked life and unfortunate end by saying,”Beware of going from the sub Lime to the Reed occulist or you could end up a mad occultist.”

Cheers and good gaming.

Rod Robertson.